I thought you hated me he said. And he said it with such hurt and conviction that I felt as if I had taken a blow to the gut. I've never been slapped with such an accusation. Never ever.
Whether or not I had said it or done anything to imply it, didn't matter. It was what I hadn't done. And time did not heal because time passed without either one of us ever saying anything. Most of the time I don't believe the words were there; not the right ones anyway.
I have realized, often the hard way, that I don't always invest in my relationships. I'm reserved, hesitant. I'm fickle and uncomfortable, even unmotivated. It's one thing to get along alright with people but it typically takes a lot for me to become friends with anyone - real friends. But things came pouring out on this night, words and tears which I hope were ointment to not quite healed wounds.
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